Choosing Yourself: The Sacred Act of Self-Respect

“It’s not selfish to choose yourself sometimes.”

Honestly, in today’s world, that sentence alone feels rebellious. Like you have to whisper it under your breath because someone, somewhere, will call you “self-centered” for daring to prioritize your peace.

But let’s be real, choosing yourself isn’t selfish. It’s sacred.

We grew up in a world where sacrifice was glorified. Our parents and grandparents were taught that love means giving everything, even when it empties you. Family meant duty. Career meant stability, not joy. Relationships meant endurance, not emotional safety. Somewhere between tradition and survival, many of them forgot to ask, “What do I actually want?”

But our generation… we’re wired differently. We’re the ones trying to unlearn generational guilt and replace it with self-awareness. We’re the ones saying, “Wait, I don’t have to follow a template just because everyone else did.” We want meaning, not just milestones.

And honestly? That’s not selfish, that’s evolution.

Because free will is the most divine gift we’ve been given. Out of all possibilities, we were born into this specific timeline, this specific body, with this one shot at being. And it would almost be disrespectful to that miracle if we lived entirely for others, never once pausing to honor our own path.

Sometimes choosing yourself looks quiet, like saying no when your soul is tired. Sometimes it’s loud, like walking away from a relationship or career everyone else thinks is “perfect.” Sometimes it’s messy, when you’re healing old wounds that no one even believes exist. But every single time, it’s honest.

And honesty is love.

See, people often confuse choosing yourself with abandoning others. But the truth is, when you choose yourself, you stop abandoning you. You stop betraying your own boundaries just to be accepted. You stop seeking validation from people who were never meant to understand your depth. You start showing up to life from fullness, not depletion.

Because how can you really love someone if you don’t even have love left within you?

I think a lot about how society tricks us into measuring worth through busyness, obedience, and how much we give away. But no one teaches us how to refill our own spirit. No one says, “Hey, you can rest. You can say no. You can take a break from pleasing everyone and just… exist.”

Our generation is realizing that “selfish” is just a word used to control people who finally start saying yes to their inner voice.

Sometimes you have to disappoint others to stay true to yourself. Sometimes you have to walk a lonely road before you find your people. Sometimes your path won’t make sense to your family, and that’s okay. They come from a different world, one that valued survival. We’re living in one that craves meaning.

You’re allowed to choose differently.
You’re allowed to choose peace over chaos.
You’re allowed to choose solitude over shallow connections.
You’re allowed to choose a slow life, a creative life, an unconventional life.

Because this, this single, fleeting, beautiful human experience, is yours.

And choosing yourself doesn’t mean rejecting others; it means meeting yourself halfway. It means saying, “I love you, but I love me too.” It’s understanding that your soul deserves to be as free as your heart dreams to be.

In a world that constantly asks, “What will people think?”
Choosing yourself is the quiet revolution.
It’s saying, “I only get one life, and I’ll live it as me.”

So no, it’s not selfish.
It’s sacred self-respect.
It’s emotional intelligence in action.
It’s spiritual alignment with your purpose.
It’s choosing to be alive, truly alive, instead of living for applause.

And that, my friend, is one of the bravest things a person can do.

P.S. A Little Note from My Heart
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Comments

10 responses to “Choosing Yourself: The Sacred Act of Self-Respect”

  1. Well said. As you say I your title, choose yourself – don’t dismiss yourself. Shalom is living with that balance, so, rather than sacrificing for your family, you are nurturing your family and have it carry to the next generation.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much.
      Yes, that balance is everything, choosing yourself so you can love others from a fuller, softer place

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Neha!

    This feels like a completely new energy. It seems our shoulders are already tired holding the weight of hundreds of years old tradition.
    Earlier the concept of a job was serving someone. But this service wasn’t based on a FREEWILL. In fact it was just opposite; it was controlling and dominating.

    I’m talking about the government jobs. I’m talking about the people working under a king, for the king.

    The FREEWILL of an individual was often beheaded with a naked sword 🗡️, without listening, interpreting and thinking for a moment. This country has suppressed and killed its talents and voices.

    The post carry so many lessons. There are good points for reflections.
    But I’m choosing to write little less this time.

    Here are some highlights:

    1. “But the truth is, when you choose yourself, you stop abandoning you. You stop betraying your own boundaries just to be accepted.”
    This is the first rule. It shouldn’t be ignored.

    2. “It’s saying, “I only get one life, and I’ll live it as me.”
    Yupp! True. 💯

    3. “And honesty is love.”
    It is. The reason I’m able to respect myself — because I’m true to myself most of the time. I don’t think I ever lied to myself, in some case, when I was informed.
    I have been like that since taking admission into the JNV. I may cry remembering my mother, but what kept me there for long was — my integrity to me (which’s very strong).

    4. “So no, it’s not selfish.
    It’s sacred self-respect.
    It’s emotional intelligence in action.”
    True! The one who obey rarely thinks about herself or himself. They don’t develop independent thinking.

    5. “We grew up in a world where sacrifice was glorified. Our parents and grandparents were taught that love means giving everything, even when it empties you. ”
    That’s the EXACTLY problem there!
    The problem is there largely.

    6. “But let’s be real, choosing yourself isn’t selfish. It’s sacred.”
    It is, friend. Definitely it is.
    Otherwise you’ll end up feeling suffocated, GUILTY, anxious and EMBARRASSED.😳

    It can’t be said MORE CLEARER than this:
    “It’s not selfish to choose yourself sometimes. Honestly, in today’s world, that sentence alone feels rebellious.”💛

    This post feels like some kind of empowerment lol.😂😂
    It’s actually empowering — because everyone is shifting THEIR LOAD to the other person. No one is really aware or TAKE RESPONSIBILITY to do something on their own.

    The Indian Government works like a huge MLM Scheme lol.😂 They keep showing off more than they do. And they are actually less in reality (self-respect, confidence, motivation, and culture).

    Thank you for sharing!✨✨

    It was needed.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi lokesh!

      Thank you for this, you always read things with so much depth, it’s great.
      And yeah, our generation is literally trying to breathe after centuries of “just obey and don’t ask why.”

      I love how you always connect everything back to real life and your own journey… it hits different when it comes from you.

      Also the MLM line took me out 😂

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Actually I do watch The Standup Comedy a lot. So my humour or view of seeing comes from there.

        Also I studied History. So there are good chances I’m informed about an invidual (identity, thinking), a society(structure, growth, movements), a politician (as a ruler, leadership skills, and contribution) and a civilization (religion, philosophy, tradition, culture, purpose of life) when it comes to the basics.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Makes Sense
        Your mind really runs on a mix of history + punchlines, and it shows in the best way. All your takes feel so layered and thoughtful.

        Tbh I watch a lot of stand-up comedy too, my favorite are of Ravi Gupta, Abhishek Upmanyu, Akash Gupta… and Bassi’s old videos were legendary

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I do watch them all. Initially I liked Akash. Abhishek Upmanyu seems a closer version of me (I don’t use abuses, but the life experiences are similar).
        Ravi is too hard to ignore. Ussko dekhoge toh usski tarah ban jaao. See how much emotional and uncontrolled he is. He develops intimacy so easily lol.😂😂😂

        Liked by 1 person

      4. There’s this guy Rajshekhar Mammidana. He doesn’t uses abuses. I do respect him a lot.
        From females there’s this south Indian girl, I’m forgetting her name right now.

        Also Zakir is good too. His home town Indore is a neighbour district to my district Dhar.

        Liked by 1 person

      5. Never heard his name actually, but now I’m curious, I’ll check him out for sure

        And yeahhh Zakir! How did I forget him…his shayaris hit straight in the feels every time.

        Liked by 1 person

      6. Exactly 😅😅

        Liked by 1 person

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