If you ask me what I wish I could do more every day, honestly, my heart screams content creation and painting. These two things light me up from within, they’re where I truly feel like me. Whether it’s pouring my thoughts into a video script, shaping ideas for a blog, or losing myself in brush strokes and colors… it’s like a breath of fresh air that my soul craves daily.
But reality doesn’t always play nice with passion. I’m a research scholar, and that comes with its own pressures, deadlines, and responsibilities. I’ve worked so hard to reach this point academically, and while I’m proud of that, there’s this whole other creative side of me that I’ve had to push into the background.
One of the biggest reasons is family expectations. Coming from a background where things like content creation are not really seen as “serious” work, it’s hard. Really hard. I know they’d never support me in this path, at least not right now. They wouldn’t understand why I’d spend hours editing a video or writing poetry when I “should” be working on getting a government job with a great salary. That’s why I’ve had to give up on painting, even though it brings me so much joy. Sometimes I miss it so much, it hurts.
Still, I haven’t given up completely. I carve out little moments here and there to work on content creation, secretly, quietly. It’s like a secret garden I escape to, where I can just be myself, free of expectations. I’ve even published a poetry book and an emotional wellness diary, and no one in my family knows about it. I’m keeping it to myself for now. I’ll only tell them when I’ve sold many copies, when I’ve made it in their eyes. Maybe then they’ll understand why it meant so much to me.
Until then, I just keep going, one page, one post, one dream at a time.
The Thought Box 
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